Today, let’s take a quick look at something you already know – but rarely have time to step back and name.

As uniquely crucial as your organization is, to your donors… it’s still one of several causes they care deeply about and support every year.

That’s not a critique. It’s simply the reality leaders work within.

You can’t fully control how much attention donors give you.
But you can influence where you sit in their minds by remembering one relationship truth.

(Most of us learn this a few weeks into marriage.)

In relationships, communication is everything.

“Yes, my day was fine” doesn’t cut it.
Compliments don’t carry over from last year.
And no – it doesn’t matter that you praised every dinner for thirteen years. Skip tonight, and you’re suddenly domeh l’mi shelo uttered a single compliment l’olam.

Donors aren’t so different.

Most donor relationships don’t end – they slowly cool, until one day you realize you’re no longer top-of-mind.

So let’s step briefly into your top donor’s prefrontal cortex and look at the nine-point checklist they’re (subconsciously) using to decide how connected they feel to you.

Rate yourself from 1–5 on each:

How well does (your name here), leader of (your organization)…

– Communicate genuine passion for the vision? A clear sense of what must be righted or built?

– Share stories that emotionally land – leaving me proud, moved, or quietly grateful I’m part of this work?

– Tell memorable stories I naturally want to repeat to others?

– Help me feel the real difference my gift is making – firsthand, not abstract?

– Show consistent, sincere appreciation for my support?

– Use strong visuals (photos or video) that reinforce confidence this is a worthy investment?

– Understand how I prefer to be communicated with?
(Have they ever asked?)

– Ask for my advice, signaling that my experience and perspective matter?

– Keep me feeling valued even in tighter times when my giving dips?

Be honest.

You probably felt confident reading some of these –
and quietly uneasy reading others.

That’s the master list – straight from your donor’s mind.

How did you score?

If you’re at 4–5 on most of these, you’re doing exceptionally well.

If (like most busy nonprofit leaders) you’re not there yet, here’s the plan:

Choose three items from the list.
If you don’t choose intentionally, your donors will quietly choose how important you are to them.

Create a concrete plan to get each one to at least a 4 – not someday, but soon.

Then notice what shifts as donor relationships deepen and your organization becomes harder to ignore.

Because relationships are relationships.

What erodes a marriage doesn’t usually look dramatic – it looks like small moments missed, signals ignored, effort assumed instead of expressed.

Donor relationships work the same way.

Get the communication right, and everything else becomes easier – including the budget.

Have a great fundraising week,
Avraham

P.S. Insight matters. Follow-through matters more. Pick your three and act on one of them this week.

Copyright © 2026 Avraham Lewis & Co.